You.

      Hi you,

   


     I can't write for awhile. My heart and soul has nothing to say right now. I'll be back.



follow me.

Rain

Rain finally sends its showered blessings from the heavens. Raindrops beat on my windows, the sun sleeps. Clouds shaped like contorted figures skate across darkness with a desire to find some sort of illumination. They won't find it. Not today.

Thunder rolls chords of intensity. It is sure to cover every fiber of the galaxy. Lightening bestows a silent film as the sky flickers with light. I stare up into the heavens and imagine millions of fireflies sending signals of their love for each other. Electrifying. Magnatizing. Beautiful.
I stand in my classroom, soaked. Drenched. Somewhere out there, children are leaping into puddles and..... two people in love are dancing in the rain.

It's a good book and a cupcake kind of day.

Tonight, Not Again

  The night                            


                                 You brushed your hands upon my flushed cheek
                              Smelled of childhood remnants of a dusty weeping willow
                                 Clouds soothe, Shredded by the calico
                                Were so vast and quick as I was on my own now.

                This time like every other time I believe that I never find
                    Another sweet girl with sequined sea foam eyes
            Ocean lapping voice smile coy as the brightest quiet span of sky
              And I'm all alone again tonight not again, not again, not again.

                And don't it feel allright. and don't it feel so nice. Lovely.

                               Still I'm unable to inhale all the riches
                             As I'm awkward as a wound on my bones
                  Still I've got cobblestone joints and plate glass points
                        As I'm all by myself tonight not again not againe

                            Well if you should nervously break down
                       When its time for the shakedown would you take it?
        It's when you cry just a little but you laugh in the middle
                    And don't it feel allright. and don't it feel so nice.
Lovely.

Say it again. Lovely. So lovely. to do it again
Again. Loving again. It's coming again.

Lovely.

Yours truly,
   Jason M.

First Dates

First dates- in other words, an interview.  We dress to impress and stuff our breathing orifices with sticks of minty gums and spearamint hard candies.  We brush our cheeks with pink tones and stroke our lips a fancy tint.  We lush our lashes so that you see the depths of color in our eyes.  Our hair is straitened, curled, crimped and intertwined just right. We hang our clothes to prevent any kind of wrinkle.  Our shoes are lined up according to which ones will match better and which ones will show off our fabulous gabs. 
      We run late as usual.  Nora Jones plays in the background as we scrummage through our aphrodiciacs.  We sprits our skin with sweet poison, a scent that will flirt with your senses.  Scents that will cause your brain to want to ask questions that you probably shouldn't be asking.  We calm our nerves with a glass of wine and we giggle as the butterflies flutter in our stomachs. We change five times and do our best to respond to incoming texts from our overly excited, nosey girlfriends.  Mirrors laugh as we rehearse how we are going to greet you. 
     " So good to see you"
    " How are you tonight, good to see you"
     " I've missed you, good to see you"
      " Hey there!!  I'm obsessed with your teeth".......     okay no.
     We do some last minute cleaning up and apply our last dab of chicka cherry lipgloss.  We hang up our damp towels that once embraced our wet hair as we prepared our beautiful faces.  Deodorant becomes an important component to staying fresh under dior circumstances-  first dates!!  We lather lotions and give prettyness one last look.  Deep breaths and sucked in guts make our way downstairs to prepare our clutches. 
    Identification- check
    Money- shouldn't need it ( hehe) but.. check
   Lip gloss- double check
   Mase- check  (haha)
   Gum- check
    Roadside assistance in case he gets a flat - check (haha)
      We carefully get in our vehicles and turn on the AC to prevent any kind of perspirations.  We find the best music to rid our nervousness.  We continuously look at ourselves in the rear view mirror to check for signs of  unevenness or loose mascara resting under our eyes. 
     We arrive at our destination and we hope that you don't see us pull up.  This way we can do any last minute adjustments- wedgies, hair fly aways, leggins twisted, bra's inside out. Haha. We grasp our clutches and hope that you are as nervous as we are.  We see your vehicle parked in the front.  More deep breaths occur as we open the door. 
   Then..
     There you are.  Smiling.  Sweating alittle.  Hands in your pockets.  Wearing your cargo shorts and a polo shirt- untucked and wrinkled a bit.  Crocs slipped over your big feet.  Your tattoo peeking under your sleeves.  Your hair is spiked and ...
              ...  you smell so good.

First date desserts- cupcakes :)

Hey! I Got Laid

        No, not me.  A very close friend of mine. "Hey guess what? I got laid".  That was the text he sent me late last night.  I have known him for eight years and he was my only virgin friend left on this planet.  He was always picked on for his choices to wait for someone he loved.  Not by me.  I loved that about him.  He is a goofy, witty and super good looking.  If you google Stefano from this seasons  American Idol, you will know what I'm talking about.  They are identical.
           Okay so I'm just gonna say it. I made the decision when I was younger to wait on doing the " great bambino" with someone until I was married.  I am 28 and I'm still holding strong.  There, now all of OS knows.  It's cool.  I think? It's really not that bad since I don't "crave" it like some people do after they do it a couple times.  Well, so I've been told.  I have been asked all kinds of questions and I have collected many pennies for when people tell me " yeah right, noone is a virgin anymore".   So, I'm rich by the way. haha. 
      My friend and I would always talk about it and kind of make fun of ourselves.. with all respect of course.  We wondered how old we would both be when we "hit the jackpot" and.. I'm not talkin about money. I JUST talked to him last week- then a virgin.. then BAM now he's been ... um... laid?? Do we still refer to sex as getting "laid"  Why?  Does anyone take it serious anymore?  Or is it just me and all the other 20 something year old virgins sneaking up on 30? Goodness.
     I spoke with him this morning and I totally expressed my feelings about him just going and doing whomever.  Yeah, to each their own.  Some people wait and others don't and that's okay.  Really.  However, he had such great intentions on waiting for the woman he truely loved.  I knew him better than that.  I asked him why he took the plunge and he replied " well, I really wanted to wait for someone I loved, but it never happened so I said screw it and just went out and did it".  
            
 WHAT??? Just like that?

  Sigh.  Crazy guy. 

I don't know if I'm more disappointed in the fact that he was so whateve about it or that he totally, sneakly beat me to the punch. Haha. 

Now what will we talk about?

Casey Grunts

    This will be short and sweet.  I am totally loving Casey on American Idol.  His voice is so brash and sexy.  He grunts and skats and kisses the judges.  He is a Seth Rogen, Lance Hartley piece of goodness on rock and roll crack. He kills it.  Kills... it.

Cupcakes with Casey tonight.

Skippy Jane Jones

   I finally broke down and adopted a gerbil for my well deserving students.  They begged and pleaded for a class pet.  As much as I love animals, I wasn't sure how I was going to take on the responsibility of my seventeen tots and a class pet that poops and flings bedding all over our mixed matched carpet.  We took a class vote and chose the name Skippy Jane Jones- after the notorious Skippy Jon Jones who takes my students imagination to a different level. 
      Our gerbil is white with red eyes.  She has been mistaken for a rat, a hamster , a mouse and a chinchilla.  Wait.. a chinchilla? Seriously?  I finally had to create a sign that says " Our new GERBIL Skippy Jane Jones".  I adopted her from a colleauge who mistakened her two gerbils as males.  When we returned from spring break, she realized one was a boy and one was a girl who got funky fresh gerbil style while everyone was on vacation. My students were so excited to hear the news as I was announcing it in circle time. 
     Explaining the roles of animal responsibility to a bunch of five and six year olds was interesting.  They had so many questions and so many different ideas on how to take care of a classroom pet.
  " We can train it to sit and roll over"
  "  We can buy a leash and walk it every day"
  " We can teach it letters and numbers and how to write"
    Then of course I have that one student who asks " do we have to wipe her butt?"
   I loved hearing all of their creative ideas for taking care of Skippy Jane Jones. I have never seen anyone so excited to have the responsibility to change her dirty cage.  If we were going to have a class pet, changing her cage was NOT going to be my responsibility. 
   Later that evening I found myself in the small pets section at Petsmart.  I stared at five different cages all of which were super cool.  Glow and the dark spinning wheels and different colored tubes sat boxed up on shelves awaiting my weakness to buythe " complete set".  I already spoil a dog, don't tell me I'm about to go all out on .... a gerbil.   I filled my cart with a state of the art cage for this little creature we were about to bring in to our beautifully chaotic classroom.  Skippy Jane Jones has no idea what she is getting herself in to.  It's one thing to be born in a third grade classroom where students aren't as hyper and hands on. 
 Poor Skippy Jane.
 One hundred and fifty dollars later, I arrived at home to assemble this quite expensive, glow in the dark, two leveled, spinning wheel frenzied gerbil cage.  I made sure to get the softest bedding so that our new friend would be comfortable.  My dog anxiously paced back in forth fearing that I would have the nerve to bring another animal in her royal castle.  Loela sniffed the bag aggressivly in hopes to find a little surprise for herself. 
             ....Sorry Loela, I didn't bring a bone home this time.
 I arrived at school the next morning with my cage and non healthy gerbil food in tote.  I can hear my students voices on the playground as they hang upside down on the monkey bars screaming " is that for OUR gerbil?"  I keep walking because if I turned around to answer, gerbil food , bedding and a three hour assembled cage would go crashing down.  They tried to beat me to the door but thank goodness for my assistant who stopped them in their hippity hoppity tracks.  I managed to get the cage placed on a sturdy surface next to my desk.  I put her bedding down and filled her tiny bowl with fresh food.  I snuck in a corn husk and some a granola bar thingy that is supposed to be good for their teeth.  It looked good.  I was tempted to take a bite. 
   I was really nervous about having this red-eyed long tail creature in my classroom, in close proximity to me.  I placed her in her cage and I watched her make herself at home.  She went right for her snack.  I giggled and said "going for the snack first huh? Looks like we have alot in common" Haha.  I studied her for a moment and wondered what her life will be like now that she is away from her mother and siblings.  It took me back to when my mom and dad left for Alabama.  I know what your thinking, how can a tiny gerbil pull a few heart strings?  I don't know.  I guess life without your parents whether they are hundres miles away or deceased, it could be scary.. even for a gerbil.  Right?
   My plans were to only let my students hold her.  I had no intensions of holding her, petting her or even sticking my fingers in her cage.  My assistant instantly became the " gerbil whisperer" as she spent most of her time holding and playing with Skippy Jane.  She continues to put the stapler down everytime she passes her cage to take a moment and talk to Skippy.  I would watch with pure amazement of how much this gerbil loves attention.  Usually, they will mind their own business or hide.  Skippy Jane, however, loves people.  Her personality is like a humans.  She knows how to get our attention and she even does little tricks like flips and stuff. 
    I'm finding myself becoming more in love with this gerbil haha.  When I come in my classroom in the mornings, she will greet me by climbing her cage to the very top and sticking her nose out.  If I am sitting at my desk, she will turn around and fall asleep, facing me in her little tube.  If I move, she moves.  If I go to the other side of the room, she will cling to her cage as if she is begging me to stay.  Silly right?  Way silly.  I laugh as I catch myself asking how her night was and talking to her as if she will one day respond-kind of like I do with my dog Loela haha.  When I hold Skippy Jane, she falls asleep in my hands.  She likes to crawl up your arm and snuggle in the crevice between the shoulder and the neck.  My assistant thinks she was a human once .  Now thats silly!!!! 
   My kids love Skippy Jane Jones and have forgotten about center time.  Instead they would rather get a book and sit quietly next to her cage and read to her.  She'll listen.  I swear it!!!  Welcome to our class Skippy Jane Jones.